Friday, April 27, 2012

NaPoWriMo #27: People talk too much

Snapshot: Talking heads
I am watching people talking --

in a crowd of people, no one is talking to each other
but they are talking; their mouths are moving, jaws
                    trembling rapidly, half dialogues heard, the other
                                                    half resides on the other side
                                                        of the phone or headpiece.

A young girl with pink 
skullcandy headphones 
clamped over her head, 
walking and singing,
Oh I swaar to u,
I be thar for ya...

                     and over there, a man is mumbling and ranting
something about having no money
                               and that it's all his useless son's fault,
and the government is watching him
                                       and you, yes you also,
 and how every time he (or you!) 
                    tries to have private chat, someone is listening in;

                                                                     everyone pulls away from him 
                                                                                as they continue talking.

This might be a rant, more-like.


dsnake1 said...


i love this! what you depict is pretty accurate. people talk a lot but few are listening. and the guy may be right about big brother. :)

Jannie Funster said...

I too LOVE this!! An everyday occasion we all hear that you captured and shared so awesomely.

Is that a real song the girl was singing? Something new these days maybe? I do not recognize it.


Fred Rutherford said...

Nice Raven. I like this as you set the premise up in the title, continued it in the first few lines and nicely transitioned to the scene and then once again, transitioned into a deeper reflection/warning. Nice job. Thanks

Ravenblack said...

dsnake: I think we are brought up to believe that about our supreme leaders. LOL.

Jannie: Yes, that is from a real song. It's "Drive by" by Train.

Fred: I wanted to compare a person really talking to himself with people talking on the phone.

People don't know how they look when they are walking along, seemingly talking to the air. Thought I expand a bit on the observation.

Anonymous said...

I enjoyed the little commentary there at the end, rant away it's your blog :). I enjoyed how you illustrate the different ways people talk to themselves (or seemingly) and the interpersonal dynamics that ensue. Thank you for your very kind comment on Polaris.

aprille said...

So true and so sad.
I used to love striking up a conversation with people. Now they are on the phone and can't be interrupted.
And often they are so loud, as if they have to shout to cover the actual distance to the personon the other end :-)

Ravenblack said...

Anna: Thanks, and it was really a pleasure to read that epic. I haven't got to commenting the latest one.

I had the most awful morning, which would probably be made into a poem. I mean...use what one gets..

Aprille: funny isn't it? It used to be that the phone interrupts the conversation not the other way around. They have to shout, especially if they are not using the headset. The world is too noisy. :)