***
Thirsty Ghost
i'm hungry i'm thirsty
i had my water but i need
something to get through
drifting, existing, invisible, listening in
on conversations strange and familiar
of housing loans, medical bills, raising children
taxes, traffic jams, floods, the latest restructures
a bully talking about how women are always
nagging, an unfaithful wife who can't understand
the lingo of kidsthesedays, a petit girl retreats
afraid she has asked too many questions
the other table has alcohol
the rest are full of vitriol
the things people do for money and 2 square meals
and not forgetting electric bills
the internet is such a threat
are you getting the new ipad
babies should not be playing with them
facebook is the new way of communicating
i need coffee but i can't find any
what kind of restaurant is this
i'm thirsty i'm not hungry anymore
***
A bit of a rant. I think it's just something I needed to put down to get it out of my system.
**Posted to Poetry Pantry #69 on Poets United.
**Featured on Wordsmith Wednesday- Snooping. My thanks to Victoria. Do visit her blog (liv2write2day at wordpress) for her poems, her stories, writing prompts and interesting discussions on the writing craft.
17 comments:
Ravenblack ... a bit of a rant you say ... I will tell you it was a good rant, totally understood and well put together.
yes, wow. i think i've been there.
to that restaurant, i mean. :)
Hello.
I can relate to your rant. It's ok to rant every now & then if it makes you feel better.
Thanks for sharing.
Thief In The Night
Writing is an excellent way to 'get things out of out of [our] systems'. This flowed nicely and clearly expressed what you were feeling.
Really nicely done. I know you say it's but a rant, but I had this image of a shelter- and perhaps some conversations there- but seating at a diner, I'm imagining all these tables filled and all these conversations going on everywhere- enough to make you need that coffee indeed, but I'd find it interesting- as I 'm always looking for dialogue or nuances to include for characters- Really well done slice of life captured here. By the way- If you have a Keurig- get the pumpkin spice- it's delicious:) Thanks for the read
Well done, great observations. I could see it all.
I love rants! True emotion minus the fancy dress.
Old Raven, Marian, Andy, Laura, Fred, Sherry, darkangel: thanks for your comments. :) I'm glad you guys can see it.
It really did happen. I was at a dinner with company I didn't enjoy. I felt like a ghost at one point because that's what happens when one doesnt fit in. It was draining because everything was so fake.
Fred, I'll keep that recommendation in mind.
darkangel, I like what you said. :D
I too was absolutely there, got the whole picture. You conveyed it perfectly.
Thank you, Rosemary. :)
'drifting, existing, invisible, listening in
on conversations strange and familiar' describes a lot of my life. Trying to communicate but never getting to the interesting parts, alienated yet not alone - or at least that's how I read parts of your poem - familiar but removed. I hope things improve soon; glad I stopped in to see if you'd posted.
Hi Anna, glad you came by. :) I might be running into a bit of dry season in terms of ideas for poems.
Yeah you got it -- alienated yet not alone. I rather be alone, honestly, but it was a function I couldnt get out of. None of the conversations at this table got further than the shallow cliche talk. I guess no one is really interested. It degenerates into complaining about life in general just to stay on the safe side.
I got the feeling it might have been the conversation at your own table that was lacking a bit, since you were familiar with the cheating wife.... I've been there, people you didn't really plan on being there with, but because they are co-workers trying to make some kind of impression, or a study group from school or a class, (though that's been years for me) or distant relatives after a funeral or wedding, I'm always uncomfortable there... ranting is certainbly a good source of relief, especially when it turns out as well as this piece did....
Well done ... You got it all just right. Here on Victoria's recommendation.
John: yeah actually I don't think I would've felt comfortable at any table really, I didn't want to be there! :D Thanks for the comments.
Jamie: Thanks for the visit and comments. And thanks for letting me know how you got here. :)
ugh...yeah i am not on FB any more so i must not be communicating...talk about convo over load...i would take coffee any day....
Brian: Coffee is good anytime. :) I've learned that FB can be detrimental to friendships. No doubt it is a great tool for keeping in touch but it can be another reason to be annoyed at someone! :)
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