Sunday, February 26, 2012

I'll never get tired of trees

****

Canopy

sunlight tripping
in and out

                                      above
and through the leaves

the branches of
sea almond trees

             spread green,
     green,                     green,
                         amber,
          yellow     ,
                red;

      filters the collected

               light
.
                        up
Faces smiling

            at the sun,
            breathing in the breeze.


****

Posted at dVerse Poetics: Sculpting a Poem. I think what they meant to look for poems inspired by sculptures. I sort of misread it, I was kinda sculpting a picture out of words. No great harm I guess.

19 comments:

Brian Miller said...

actually you are fine...she did say you could use a shape or ...it works...smiles...lovely imagery...the light filtering through...of course i am a sucker for nature as well...

oceangirl said...

I think this is exactly what Victoria meant, sculptured, multilayered, using a poet's tool. A very lovely poem.

Ravenblack said...

Brian: thanks! :D

Oceangirl: thank you. :)

Bodhirose said...

I'll never get tired of trees either...this felt so light and just made me feel good in reading it...lovely.

pandamoniumcat said...

Oh I am a tree hugging hippie so this poem is a favourite... I love the style and feel...it's like you sprinkled your words like sunlight through the trees.

janaki nagaraj said...

Beautiful...it is a coincidence we are using the same theme.

Claudia said...

just yesterday i stood under a birch tree and was just fascinated again by the beauty they breathe...well captured..

Dave King said...

No harm, certainly! I've been trying to do this for years! Absolutely love it.

Blue Flute said...

I like what you did, good poem! Not only did the words capture the image you were creating and flow well together, the visual placement reinforced the theme.

Daydreamertoo said...

This is wonderful, both for it's sculpting and for its imagery. A really fabulous write on all counts :)

Mary said...

Beautiful! I like the placements of words in your poem. It conveys the idea well of being beneath a tree and looking up!

Heaven said...

using nature as a metaphor always works for me..this is lovely image ~

great to see you writing again ~

Laurie Kolp said...

I think you have sculpted an exquisite piece of art through your poetry!

hedgewitch said...

Very fluid and a perfect 'tree sculpture' in words--all trees are a sculpture to the right eye, I think. Liked this much.

Victoria said...

Great take on the prompt. I felt like I was peeking through the branches of a tree. Lovely.

Fred Rutherford said...

Oh me neither, I love the trees and all the offer. Canopy is a great word to use here. really like the pattern you sculpted here, then the one line that gets me the most here is the faces smiling, as it offers an emotion showing within the description itself. Really nice job Raven, thanks.

Ravenblack said...

Thanks everyone for the wonderful comments and feedback. Really appreciate it. :)

Raven said...

A tribute after my own heart!!!!!

Ravenblack said...

:)