Monday, April 9, 2012

NaPoWriMo #9: Lumberjacks -- Someone is gonna have to pay someday

 ***

Lumberjacks

a piece of paper
carried by the wind
lands at my feet

a bank statement
of few transactions

withdrawals
more than deposits

withdrawals for bills

                          bills
                          bills
and more           bills

diminishing the size
of one's nest egg
demanding what's owed
for living

we pay ourselves
for services rendered

mine becomes yours
yours becomes mine

a circulation of constant
withdrawals

lumberjacks breaking bread
with lumberjacks

***



Posted at Open Link Monday on Imaginary Garden With Real Toads.


Final version was published in Nain Rouge, Sep 2012.  http://www.whitecatpublications.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/NAIN-ROUGE-September-10th-2012.pdf

24 comments:

Claudia said...

a circulation of constant withdrawals...at times it is...and it goes on and on...great metaphor for so many things in life..

Kerry O'Connor said...

I really like your style - very post-modern, with a topical subject.

Mary said...

Sometimes the withdrawals seem endless and the deposits are few. Sometimes life is just like that.

Denise Moncrief said...

I really like the visual imagery of bills, bills, and more bills, as if they just keep falling on our heads. They are many things in life that are that way. Some things just keep on cycling. Great post!

Brian Miller said...

a circulation of constant withdrawls...i like that..and it captures life much...we take a little each time we come together...an have to question our deposits...smiles.

Anonymous said...

well, when you put it like that it all sounds a little bit insane, doesn't it? I love your poem, a note of sanity in a world gone crazy

Sherry Blue Sky said...

Oh I related to this one!!!! withdrawals, withdrawals, withdrawals! Good one!

Abin Chakraborty said...

In this recession-ridden world, withdrawals are compulsively excessive and the world does seem "a circulation of constant withdrawals."

Unknown said...

And thus the fiscal world goes round and round. This piece, both in format and diction, nicely illustrates the truth.

Unknown said...

And thus the fiscal world goes round and round. This piece, both in format and diction, nicely illustrates the truth.

Semaphore said...

You made me think, 'Why lumberjacks?' ...And as I pondered, the trail from wood to pulp to paper to that bill flying in the wind began to be clearer, and I thought - what a compunded tragedy in this social commentary turned poem.

Laurie Kolp said...

I like the metaphor here with the nest egg b/c I can so relate.

Unknown said...

Raven, I get like this all the time. There are certain companies out there that I'll keep nameless, but it seems like they are sending out the same flyers three to four times every week with nothing new- such a waste of paper and so many other examples, has been a topic that has irked me for sometime now-thanks for putting this down, and taking it much deeper than I would've thought to do…great job. Thanks

Daydreamertoo said...

So very true and, with the way things are, it isn't about to get any easier any time soon.
Very nicely said.

Susie Clevenger said...

a circle of withdrawals..it does seem endless...so much to think about in this one.

Scarlet said...

Your ending lines are food for thought...it seems never ending, is it? I feel as I work everyday in the city.

And thanks for your lovely words in my blogoversary ~ I appreciate it ~

Ravenblack said...

Thanks for all your awesome comments, everyone.

I think many, me and people around me, we are running in circles chasing after stuff, or just trying to keep up or survive. It feels like an endless grind. I was wondering what our collective bank statement might look like. :)

Semaphore: Yeah, you got my intention for the lumberjacks ending. Everyone of us would have used something from a tree.

Fred: Flyer. I hate those. They stuff my mailbox with them, shove them through under the door, stick at the gate. It really is a big waste and a big mess it creates.

Thanks again everyone, I shall come around to your blogs soon if I haven't.

dsnake1 said...

we are talking about printing less at home or work and yet i see people printing out unnecessary stuff at work. email that's a mile long, big attachments/files.

i think that's a habit that's hard to change, esp. here.

Herotomost said...

Ohhhhhhhhh....I'm a lumber jack and I'm OK....I sleep all night and I work all day! LOL, this is a little slice of painful truth thats like a kick in the shins every time you think about it. You wrapped that pain in a pleasing cyber wrapper and shared.....this lumberjack is OK with that. Great work.

P.S. It tastes better when you share.....now give me some candy.

M. A. S. said...

I love the title and the last line.

Ravenblack said...

dsnake: They say print less, but they want you to print it out. In my job where there's a lot of reading to be done, academic papers are printed out by the stack. IMHO, they should just give us ipads. We would be able to read the pdfs and save some trees. Win-win.

Herotomost: :) Thanks for your cheerful response. Made my day.

M.A.S.: Thanks for your visit.

Cressida de Nova said...

Very creative idea ..writing a poem about a bank withdrawal slip. I used to put all my bills in a pink jug until I was ready to face them. It turned out not to be such a great idea:)Enjoyed your poem.

Ravenblack said...

Cressida: I know that feeling. Sometimes you just want a break I guess, not to think of them for a while when you are piled up. Thanks for reading and commenting. :)

Margaret said...

a circulation of constant
withdrawals

This has a spiraling out of control feel to it, that's for sure!