Wasp
Yellow pollen
sprinkled all over,
disposition
matching the sunny day.
A halo hovering above
a bed of rain lilies
that bloom post monsoon.
Around, and back
around
round round
round
and suddenlystop
to face an open flower
then face away
and again faces the flower --
this is its dance,
its joy in being alive
like the rain lilies
23 comments:
i see you have a cheery start to Napowrimo. :)
Awesome start! Love your spacing.
Raven, great first write for poetry month. Really like the way you captured the wasp's flight. Both in description and in the way you structured the placement of the words. Very nicely done. Thanks
I can feel its joy that spring has sprung and he's filling his winter larder already.
xo
nice..i like the ref to the lilies after the monsoon there at the end as i think it is a great wrap...and spring, its beautiful aint it...back to life...again...
dsnake, John, Fred, Jannie and Brian: Thanks for the comments and visit. :)
Happy Spring to you all.
I really enjoyed your Springtime idyll. It had a bit of a haiku feel to it.
One of the best parts, for me, was when "concrete" poetry took over, the words buzzing around the haloed flowerbed like the hovering of your insects. A wonderful start to the month!
I can picture this through your well chosen words. As someone else mentioned, I like the spacing too. Happy spring.
Oh, I was about to dance with it too!
This is lovely! Such a good capture of some of the joys of spring.
Vivinfrance, Semaphore, Mary and Daydreamer: thanks for the comments and feedback.
Much appreciated your joyful reactions. :)
This one is alive, great write! So happy to see you're participating in NaMoWriMo too!
Ahh... I especially enjoyed the first two stanzas.
So beautiful. I could see "the dance". Uplifting, on this gray rainy day.
As a resident of the Sonora Desert, I relate to the scenes painted here. Monsoon... rain lilies... the changing weather on a hot day... all familiar to me.
I like the arrangement of the words...I feel the dancing and zipping thru the blooms ~
Love the spacing, the round and round expression.
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I could feel the motions while reading the words here, almost like I were the creature facing an open flower...
Your lovely words dance on the screen!
Thanks for the visit and comments, kulasa and Mary.
I love that last stanza...pretty amazing visual....this one took me around...and around, around...great writing.
That's exactly how I feel today!!
This is my fave of yours. Well, one of my faves, as you write so well.
xo
Thanks Jannie. That means a lot. :)
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